Holiday acquaintances from hell

Willie Mcgrotty

Willie Mcgrotty

Well-known member
Probably most of us have done it, after a few drinks "they seem nice, we'll meet you tomorrow".
Two spring to mind, both in Greece firstly a bloke from Preston, never spoken to one of those before, only wanted to speak about two topics...PNE & his job with rentokil. Both revolting subjects.
Secondly a bloke who came out with his IOM TT races tee shirt. I've absolutely no interest in motorbikes, didn't stop him though.
And his dog was bigger than my dog 🙄 .
"Quick hide, it's them".
 
We don't make that mistake anymore. In the past we've spoken to others and that might they've saved us a table in the diner and the next day sunbeds around the pool. If you speak to others, it's likely to turn out to be like a story from Benidorm on TV - we keep ourselves to ourselves now!
 
Brett scores for fun said:
We don't make that mistake anymore. In the past we've spoken to others and that might they've saved us a table in the diner and the next day sunbeds around the pool. If you speak to others, it's likely to turn out to be like a story from Benidorm on TV - we keep ourselves to ourselves now!
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To be fair Brett both the examples I made were over 20yrs ago. Big learning curve.
 
How is it theres always someone staying at your hotel that seems to know everyone else? The hub of everything and very popular. How did they develop this in less than a week? Its maddening.
 
When i go to my local restaurant ,in Vera playa we take the dogs with us ,and you can bet we end up with some boring bastards who are on holiday ,it usually starts with ha look at them dogs aren't they lovely ,what are they then it starts , wouldn't mind but they are jack Russell 😀😀.
 
Me, wife and son camping near the Lizard in Cornwall. I always get a pub day on my own and they gave me a lift to a pub called the Blue Peter - been in the Good Beer Guide for years. It was lunchtime and only me and two old locals in there. Next thing, in walk three blokes together, in their 40s, all wearing nobber shirts. How is that possible? The furthest south on the British mainland and all I want is a good beer day out. Jeez!
 
Met a couple on holiday, he wanted to be everyone's best friend, somehow he liked me as saw me as a challenge.
He basically tried to take our holiday over,everywhere we went they turned up.
On the last day of the holiday we crept out early to avoid hugs and changing of phone numbers.
3 months later he rang us up (got our phone number from hotel reception) and invited us to a show , he'd paid for the tickets.
We went to be courteous, but were not looking forward to it. We arranged to meet at his house and when we got there were greeted by them and 3 other couples he'd met on other holidays 😬. Crap night , changed the phone number when we got home.
 
The Merry Stripes said:
Met a couple on holiday, he wanted to be everyone's best friend, somehow he liked me as saw me as a challenge.
He basically tried to take our holiday over,everywhere we went they turned up.
On the last day of the holiday we crept out early to avoid hugs and changing of phone numbers.
3 months later he rang us up (got our phone number from hotel reception) and invited us to a show , he'd paid for the tickets.
We went to be courteous, but were not looking forward to it. We arranged to meet at his house and when we got there were greeted by them and 3 other couples he'd met on other holidays 😬. Crap night , changed the phone number when we got home.
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I was convinced that story would end with an introduction to swinging. Quite disappointed really.
 
I love to read on trip advisor “There were no brits in the hotel and hardly anyone spoke English”.
That’s normally a cue for me to hit the purchase button immediately.
At the end of the holiday you arrive at the airport to see the scruffiest, unruly line of lobsters and know immediately that’s the flight back to Manchester.
 
Ooooo get me....my other half and I cruised round the Med last year, and on day one I proudly wore my blue anniversary Wonga shirt.
That attracted the attention of a Burnley supporter and his wife.

As you know, there’s not many places you can go on a boat without bumping into the same people on a constant basis.
If I heard all his exploits about supporting an established Premier league team once, I must have heard it a million times.
 
We went on a cruise last years and would always find it interesting when you joined a table for dinner and they would say they were ‘massive football fans’ and yet when you told them your supported Blackpool their only reference point was ‘Charlie Adams’ 🥴
 
The football fans you meet on holiday are soooo tedious. Especially the armchair Manyoo or Liverpool fans, who despite being over 40 only seem to know about the last two years, and talk absolute drivel. despite being a Blackpool fan you know more about 'their club' that they do, but they insist on patronising you because you support a lower level club than them.

Whilst away in Fuengirola in January of this year, I managed to wangle a night out in my own at the London bar on the Wednesday night, when they had all the prem games on across all the 6 tellies. Man U and Liverpool scored within a minute of each other and all the plastics went wild, then went out for a fag half way through......I bloody despise them. One of them was slagging Pogba off all night even though he wasn't playing in the match, he was mistaking Martial for him.
 
The worst is when people try and make conversation and they have that desperate look of “let’s be holiday friends”.

I also get told I’m anti social - it often backfires on my partner when she’s wanting to chill on the sunbed and someone won’t stop talki!!!

also hate hotel theme nights - awful.

don’t mind saying hello, but not entering into conversation.
 
The first time I took my kids abroad alone ages 3 and 9 I was naive to this phenomena. Got myself embroiled with a massive group of randomers who didn’t know each other from Adam never mind me!
In a way it’s nice that people drag you into these weird acquaintances, still have the holiday group pics of about 30 of us at the hotel disco.
Problem is when they start phoning you when you get home telling you all their issues with their ‘other half’and asking to come and visit you for a week 🥴
I learnt how to appear stand offish and unapproachable for the next holiday.
I need to master that look in general, it’s a standing joke the amount of strangers who accost me in day to day life. My sister left me seated in Debenhams just prior to lockdown whilst she paid for some boots and the minute she went someone sat next to me and offloaded their life story.
My sister returned and said I knew someone would have made a friend of you by the time I got back 🤣🥴
 
There was one guy in our hotel in Sorrento 1983.The word prat was invented for him he was in his forties with a teenage daughter and long suffering wife.
Actually felt sorry for them two.
At the welcome Rep Spiel,he’s tapping away working out the cost of trips on his calculator.
Funniest was when he was walking towards the pool with his fat belly Walkman on and frogman type flippers.
Fortunately some other poor sods got landed with him.
 
PNENIL said:
How is it theres always someone staying at your hotel that seems to know everyone else? The hub of everything and very popular. How did they develop this in less than a week? Its maddening.
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They think they're popular. Everyone else is trying to avoid them.
 
I once went on a week's break by Eurostar to the Loire Valley. There was an old bloke and his wife sitting chatting to two muttons dressed as lambs on the train and I said to my wife I'm glad we won't have to chat with them.

On arriving at the first hotel, there was only a very small lift and the old bloke was struggling with his cases, there were no staff to assist, so I took his luggage up the stairs to his third floor room.

We spoke a bit and I kept an eye on him helping where needed.

It was only half way through the holiday that I found out he was Colin Dexter, the writer of Morse. As I hadn't bothered him or made a beeline for him and as he used me to escape from the two women on the train we became friends for the duration. A very nice chap.
 
Sat next to a couple flying to Kavala in 2000 who were staying in the same apartments as me and the misses.Been friends since then and speak to them regularly. They live in Wolverhampton. We have also remain friends with a couple from Stoke who we met on Thassos.
 
Never, I repeat never speak to anyone else while on holiday - they'll ruin the sanctuary of it all.
If someone approaches you to converse, then either
a) Speak back to them in a foreign language (a made up one is a better bet) or
b) Smack them in the chops

Sorted.
 
In Jaipur, India, going up a stair well, when some bloke wearing a knobber shirt came down. ‘F*****g Preston wan***’ I said. Kept seeing him for days and he tried to befriend me several times. Didn’t get that I wanted nothing to do with him.
 
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