International poetry day

[Matesrates]

Heard this read out by Vernon Kay on radio 2 this morning, though it was very good. Feel free to post your own, the boy stood on the burning bridge included

 

[Trammo]

A wondrous bird is the pelican,
His bill holds more than his belican,
He can take in his beak
Enough food for a week,
But i’m dumbfounded
To know how the helican.

 

[Matesrates]

The boy stood on the burning bridge
his name was Owen Oyston
he shouted to fans
help, give me a hand
so they gave him a round
and watched him go down
until they knew he was damned.

 

[Tangerinemoss]

On yonder hill, there stands a coo,
If he's no there, he's awa the noo.

 

[navel]

Love Like Anthrax

Who would hack at the sunflower,
let him take heed. Your gunships
might strafe our skin, your tanks
ride roughshod over our bones,
cruise missiles pierce our heart,
your fog of war sear our lungs,
your embrace around our throat
attempt to squeeze freedom out.
But your misguided attentions,
your brute attempt to deflower, we
unrequite unreservedly. As one body
we reject your love like anthrax.
Our soul is steely and our hatred
will haunt you to your barren grave.

(March 2022)

 

[Matesrates]

Love Like Anthrax

Who would hack at the sunflower,
let him take heed. Your gunships
might strafe our skin, your tanks
ride roughshod over our bones,
cruise missiles pierce our heart,
your fog of war sear our lungs,
your embrace around our throat
attempt to squeeze freedom out.
But your misguided attentions,
your brute attempt to deflower, we
unrequite unreservedly. As one body
we reject your love like anthrax.
Our soul is steely and our hatred
will haunt you to your barren grave.

(March 2022)

Brilliant

 

[Pasty Muncher]

No way, no way, no way
Is it International Poetry Day
Oh hang on
I was wrong

 

[Bloodtangerine]

There was a young lady named Alice,
Who used dynamite for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And part of her asshole in Dallas.

 

[Colonel Bogey]

A policeman from near Clapham Junction
Had a penis that just wouldn’t function
For most of his life
He misled his poor wife
With some snot on the end of his truncheon.

 

[Matesrates]

The poetry standard is amazing

 

[Wizzerboy]

Nob end gave out tickets for the show.
But the homeless and needy said no.
Wouldn't go if you paid me
I reply to you simply
You get battered everywhere you go

 

[Curryman]

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

‘Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!’ …

Probably the daftest poem of all time.

 

[Bluecabinboy]

 

[Matesrates]

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

‘Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!’ …

Probably the daftest poem of all time.

Any chance of a translation?

 

[navel]

Brilliant

Thanks Matesrates. It's from a recent blog linked here: Ukraine

 

[Davepick]

This is the tale of Mary Knox
She gave ten thousand men the Pox,
Soldiers, Sailors, men of honour,
Fought like f*** to get upon her
Now she's dead and well forgotten,
The smell of her **** was something rotten.

I think it was Shakespeare.

 

[bleach51]

The only thing I relate to with regard to poetry was being asked at school what did I think the poet was trying to tell us….my reaction was I don’t know and I don’t ( expletive deleted) care and to this day it still applies.

 

[Bottle]

“Burning bridge?”

You mean “burning deck” surely
And don’t call me Shirley
A poem called Casabianca, misquoted
That’s Mrs Quoted to you, Curley

Not very International these, they are all in English