I ended up trying to work it out using physical props, which I set out in the back room so the Mrs didn’t think I was mental..
I used the room to represent the Farm
A cavalier King Charles Spaniel (Max) to represent Fully Grown Animals
A Border Terrier (Loki) to represent Calves
A packet of Lincolnshire Sausages represented (or actually was) Meat
And Milk for Milk
Anyway I’d managed to duct tape the sausages to the Spaniel and was trying to tape the Milk to the underside of the Border Terrier, when the Mrs entered the room.
I tried explaining….and then complete mayhem broke out as the Border Terrier tried to snaffle the sausages….
The conclusion I finally reached was that The EPL is a Farm full of Dogs who are milking the Championship, Whilst the Championship is a small dog fighting for sausages.